Who was your first love?

Who was your first love? For me, the answer is simple—my mother. I am absolutely a momma’s girl! Our journey began in a special way! When I was born, she and my dad decided that my mom would stay home with me, serve as my primary care giver, and this lasted for two years.

She always told me that I was a lovely baby, even tempered, and had a face full of smiles! As a result, she enjoyed giving me baths, feeding me, changing diapers, and sleepless nights. Instantly, my mother deeply enjoyed motherhood!

The irony is that my mother was a college professor of social work until she went on maternity leave, which ultimately resulted in leaving an enjoyable career in higher education to lay a healthy foundation for her child. She is a graduate of two Historically Black Colleges and Universities (HBCUs)-Central State University and Howard University. Moreover, she absolutely loved her career and she loved to work. Therefore, my mother made a sacrifice for me and I am thankful!

Throughout my entire teaching career, I have worked with parents who sacrifice daily for their children and they ultimately want the best for their children. Typically, mothers are more present at parent-teacher conferences and back-to-school nights. Oftentimes, these mothers have worked all day and are exhausted, but they show up for their children.

Today, I teach college, but I started my career teaching high school. Yet, the dynamic has not changed; my adult students who are parents (especially mothers), make it known that they love their children, and they are pursuing a college education to make life better for their children.

Good parents often wonder at every turn, phase, and age if they are making the right choices—sacrifices for their children. Children do not always understand their parents’ sacrifices and developmentally children are not supposed to understand. In fact, there are some things children will not understand until they become an adult. For instance, it was impossible until I became an adult for me to fully understand the sacrifice my mother made in disrupting her career when I was born. Yet, there were many other sacrifices she made throughout our journey that I understood sooner, and one is the gift of love. Feeling love for a child is often natural, but showing love is intentional, deliberate, and is often sacrificial. In essence, showing love is not always easy, which is why I love the book: The Five Languages by Gary Chapman.

Yet, when we can move through the different phases of human growth and development with knowledge that we are loved, it makes a difference in our attitude, behavior, mental, physical, and spiritual well-being. Love does not result in the absence of problems, mistakes, or challenges. Love does, however, make life better!

Who was your first love? More importantly, who do you show love to today?